Technology is turning us into zombies, a little bit. Don’t get me wrong, I love technology, I love how it makes the world smaller, I love how it makes life easier and less stressful, I truly consider my iPhone the next best thing to a husband…especially because it is not afraid to ask for directions and always wants to watch the movies I want to watch.
HOWEVER, have you ever been in this scenario in the supermarket? You’re attempting to leave an aisle and you can’t because the person in front of you is slowly, slowly, shuffling along, very slowly. You quickly think to yourself, this person is:
a) Disabled
b) Elderly
c) Back from the dead
d) TEXTING!!!!
If it’s a) and/or b), I’m happy to wait for you, please take your time. But both of these options can generally be ruled out rather quickly, even from behind. If it’s c), uh, then I don’t even care about ruling it out, no need for me to be loitering near any fellow shopper I even remotely suspect of being a zombie. But if it's d) then get the fuck out of my way!! Seriously! I’m not spending my whole night in aisle 6 so you can text "sup?” to random persons on your contact list that you have deemed most likely to respond!